Ladies: Body or Bulge?

Dear Friends,

I used to question myself, what if I was endowed with a body like this?

I used to think that:

a) I could be the HONEY that could attract the bees.

b) I could be a model on Men's Review.

c) I could be featured on YouTube and disgrace myself like Ms. Singapore, Ris Low.

Having a body like this could also be TOUGH, excuse the pun. I used to marvel how would it be for the ladies touching me. Will they leave me after the first date? Caressing me would be akin to lifting barbells hence developing muscles of their own during the intimacy.

Sucking grapes in my mouth, I am glad that my body is not that. This picture was taken three years back. Imagine this; if I were to have breasts and wearing a push up bra, I wouldn't be able to cypher which was breasts and which was the double chin.

Out of the blues, I settled that I wanted to feel good and healthy about myself and most importantly to live life. My objective - TO LOSE WEIGHT. Having been a health freak for a few years now, I know skipping meals was not an option. So, I decided to eat balanced and healthy. Those who knows me will tell you, that I do not have a sweet tooth and I swallow up to six supplements a day. Most importantly and taboo to some, EXERCISE. I do both cardiovacular and weights training at the gym twice a week, swim once a week and some bowling to de-stress.

Once, I read about this American bloke called Jared Forgle. This guy was overweight and if he continued eating, he needed to reconstruct a new door to his house for his entrance(*exaggeration*). Hang on, by consuming SUBWAY SANDWICHES and exercising, he shed the pounds. By 'accident', I chanced upon SUBWAY at the mall where Celebrity Fitness is located. I decided that I was going to be a 'test product' of this assertion and decide if it was for real.

3 MONTHS AND NO MORE!

My favorite bread is WHEAT and occasionally PARMESAN OREGANO. I only go for the specials of the day - where they are priced at only RM 7.50 compared to the normal prices, which ranges from RM10.50 and more. You have a choice of either the 6-inch or the one foot - mine is always the former. As I was eating this on a frequent basis, it doesn't really matter when I eat what and on what day. If I devour them one a day at RM 7.50, I would have completed the entire menu in a week. So, the 'specials' it is. Once in line and my choice of bread selected, I will then decide on the 'meat special' or fillings of the day. I was told that their meats contain less than 6g of fat. My favorites would have to be the ITALIAN BMT which means 'BIGGEST, MEATIEST and TASTIEST'. Secondly, it would have to be the TUNA. Both of these are 'SPECIALS' on Mondays and Tuesdays respectively. Once the 'meats' are stuffed, I will be greeted with the freshest vegetables. Mine will always be, "EVERYTHING except OLIVES". To top it up, I will ask for a doze of olive oil, vinegar and a sprinkle of pepper for taste. The vegetables are crunchy but at times, the moisture of it could make the sandwich a little marshy to handle (especially the 'MEATBALLS' - special on Wednesdays).

Consuming this diet three times a week, I have graduated from my third month now. I am beaming with hope realising the double chin has now CHISELED.

I will proceed to eat 'SUBWAY SANDWICHES' and also to uphold burning a minimum of a thousand calories per gym session. Moving ahead, I am aspiring to attain the body that every man fantasises of.

If I am still a let down, maybe I could instead canvass to be an:

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UNDERWEAR MODEL, No face and body contours needed.

ONLY A HUGE BULGE!

* This is not written as an ADVERTORIAL. However, I will not SAY NO if Subway decides to reward this blog with FREE sandwiches. :)